


You Should Be My Boyfriend

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Humanstuck, M/M, Party, dave and rose are half siblings, drunk Dave, just because
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-17
Updated: 2015-03-17
Packaged: 2018-03-18 06:14:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3559103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Karkat takin care of a drunk dumb baby</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Should Be My Boyfriend

Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you’re lying around on your couch, flicking through tv channels without really paying any attention. Dave texted you earlier asking if you wanted to go with him to a party at Terezi’s, but you weren’t in the mood. Vriska was going to be there and she’s a nice girl at heart, you know, but you weren’t interested in trying to deal with her.

So now its the middle of the night, and you finally click off the tv, and your phone buzzes so loud it scares the ever loving shit out of you. You grab it off the coffee table and it’s John, to your surprise. The message, however, is of no surprise.

John: please come get your boyfriend. he’s running around without his shirt and harassing Sollux. no one is having a good time

You can think of any number of reasons to ignore the text. One, you and Dave aren’t dating (no matter how much you wish you were), and everyone knows it.

Two, John and Rose can control Dave just fine, there is no need to drag you out of your apartment in the middle of the night and make you drive all the way to Terezi’s.

Three, you love anything that causes Sollux Captor distress.

Still, you text him back saying that fine, you will come pick up your stupid FRIEND, and John owes you one for keeping this party a safe and happy environment.

You pocket your phone and grab your keys and shoes and don’t bother with a sweatshirt because its summer, and its warm out even at this unearthly hour.

Shockingly enough, not a lot of people are driving around at one in the morning. You’re a bit surprised Strider is already drunk enough to be causing trouble this early, you don’t usually get texts to remove him until at least three.

He and Rose are standing on the porch when you pull up, Rose standing upright though she’s probably as drunk as he is, with Dave leaning on her shoulder, giggling at something. He’s wearing black skinny jeans and an overlarge blue t shirt you know must be something that was dug up so he wouldn’t be shirtless, because Dave would never wear it, especially not to a party. His shades are on top of his head and you can see his eyes even from here.

You roll down the window to yell at Strider to get his drunk ass down here, but Rose has already begun walking him off the porch and across the yard.

She stops by your window and tries to get him to go around to the passenger side, but he throws an arm around her shoulders and kisses her cheek, missing and mostly getting the corner of her eye. “See you later, sister from another mother.”

She rolls her eyes and pushes him again. “Though genetically correct, you’ve said the phrase wrong.”

With another drunken grin and not a care in the world, Dave stumbles around the front of the car and slides into the passenger seat next to you. You ignore him leaning on you to speak with Rose. Now that she’s closer you can see she’s not as drunk as you would have expected her to be. Its still early.

"I’m very sorry you had to leave your home at this hour to come get him," she says, leaning down a bit to be eye level with you.

"Its okay," you grumble. Strider has his head on your shoulder and is pushing his forehead into the sleeve of your t shirt.

"He does not drink often, as I’m sure you know, but he tends to overdo it when he does."

You do know this. “He’ll be okay, probably, the stupid prick.”

Rose cracks a smile. “I’m sure he will.” She tilts her head to look past you. “Goodnight, Dave.”

"Good niiight, big sister," he sings. He drops his head back onto your shoulder and shakes his head back back and forth, smiling.

"Bye Rose," you say to her. She waves and heads back toward the house and you back out of the driveway, trying to keep Dave upright while still focusing on the road.

When you get him back to your apartment in one piece, he makes a show of hissing at the bright lights and flicking his shades back over his eyes. He falls onto the couch beside you and curls up against your chest. He looks small, like this, with his tight jeans and loose shirt and when you ask him where he got it he says a blue pirate delivered it to him, so you assume Vriska had something to do with it. You’d think she gave him the shirt off her own back if it wasn’t so loose.

Dave leans against your chest and buries his face in your neck and he’s kissing it a bit, you think, but you’re not really sure. “Kaaarkat,” he sings to himself.

You don’t know if he was trying to get your attention or just talking to himself, but you reply. “Yes, Dave?”

"I looove you."

You blink a few times, then move his head away from your neck. “I love you too, you should get some sleep.”

He grins at you. “You should sleep with me.” You raise one eyebrow and his grin quickly fades into a look of confusion. “I don’t mean like… Not sex.” He giggles a bit – _giggles_  – then wiggles his eyebrows. “If we have sex I wanna remember it.” The words make you choke a bit but he continues, unfazed. “I mean like, I just wanna cuddle and fall asleep with you.”

You think that can be arranged. “Alright then, up we go.” You nudge him away from you and into a standing position, then lead him to your room. He flops on the bed and wriggles out of his jeans before shimmying under the sheets in his underwear and t shirt. He holds the covers back and pats the space beside him.

You remove your own jeans and slip on some shorts and join him in bed, pulling the sheets back over you both. He snuggles up to your side and buries his face in the crook of your neck again, and you will always marvel at how _sweet_  Dave is when he’s drunk.

"Heeey, Karkat, you’re really pretty," he mumbles into your skin.

You blush. “Thanks.” You turn off the light then tilt his face up so you can remove his shades, and he smiles at you and leans in to kiss your cheek. The action is shy, and its over before you can register it. When you glance over he’s blushing and not looking at you, so you lean down to kiss him back, on the forehead.

He grins at the wall and pushes himself somehow even closer, then closes his eyes and starts humming. “This is nice,” he says after a while. You hum a bit in agreement. “We should do this all the time. Like boyfriends. You should be my boyfriend.”

You blush again but nod slowly. Doesn’t sound so bad. “Okay, Strider.”

**Author's Note:**

> The document i wrote this in was titled 'drunk!dave im weak' and the summary just said 'see above'


End file.
